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To the guy I didn't choose.

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To the guy I didn't choose. Keep moving.

I can still remember the day I first saw you. I was sitting on the other side of the room, and you were there- having conversation with your friends. Of all the people lurking there, I laid my eyes on you, a bearded guy wearing a violet shirt. I can hear you talking about your extreme adventures and experiences, not to mention that I liked how your lips excitedly throw every word with conviction, to justify how intense and strenuous your outdoor activities were. After some time you looked at my side, our eyes met... And I immediately looked away.

After a week, I was scrolling through my Instagram, someone I didn't know commented on my latest Instagram post. I peeked on its account and saw a familiar face. It was the bearded guy I saw at the last event I attended. And wow, this guy is really good in photography! #instagramgoals. We followed each other on ig. The next thing I know we were already exchanging comments on my post. But that’s it. Nothing more and nothing followed.

Month’s pass by and I think cupid is pretty much doing his job. I was walking in Ayala underpass when we bumped into each other. I was like “OMG! Instagram Guy?” and you were like “Hellooo! Instagram Girl”. You invited me out for a small chit chat and surprisingly we are of the same wave length. We make each other laugh with the same level of humor that we have. It’s like you’re a long lost friend of mine for the fact that we didn’t even notice that we have been talking for hours about anything...and everything.

Since we were working on the same area, we frequently see each other. No. We’re definitely not dating. I became very honest with you from the start. I am dating someone else. You were informed. Yeah, were not yet official, but at least that’s the thought. I don’t wanna give you false hope. I can feel that you see me more than a friend before you even confess your feelings with me but I don’t want to entertain the thought. Coz we both know that I am dating someone else. You are so nice; I can definitely say everything that pops up on my head without any filter because that’s how much I am comfortable when I’m with you. I found a confidant in you, you always find time to listen to my problems and find ways to make me feel better.

You reminded me that I am beautiful inside and out. You remember every single detail about me-you were actually paying attention and that’s how you got me. Your sincerity. You appreciate my talents and build them up. You helped me grow. And what did I ever gave you? Pain.

I’m feeling torn. Although technically I am single but I wanna be loyal to the guy I am currently dating.

Timing has a lot to do with this. I could have bumped into you 6 months earlier or maybe not at all. It could have been more peaceful if we didn’t, right? No, scratch that. I didn't regret that I met you. You see, you were a good friend and maybe... that’s all we’ll ever be. As happy as I am with you, I can tell that you were a catastrophic distraction. I’ve been frank that I need to choose between you and him. Before I even decide, you said that you will just distance yourself.

I didn’t want to loose a friend. A special friend. Then you asked me if I believe in destiny and I said, yes. “So yeah, if we are really for each other, destiny will find its way"

The truth is I like you but there's something between this situation that is dragging me not to choose you. You are a man full of dreams and passion, I don't want to interrupt your greatness nor want to loose you over wrong timing.

 I don't wanna be unfair to the both of you so I had to end this illusion. Yes, I am choosing him. For many reasons that I will not elaborate anymore.


 You're a good friend. A good listener. Maybe we've just mixed the emotions of liking a friend versus liking someone in a romantic way. Maybe, after months and you don't have any feelings for me anymore, we can start all over again, as friends.

This is life. We’ve got to make choices. There is no right or wrong choice. I just hope that I have taught you some things, because I know I have learned so much from you. You’re nice, adventurous and funny. Don’t ever change.

Maybe we will loose contact.

Maybe we will stay in touch.

I don't know.

There are a lot of maybe's.

But.... Maybe if we’re lucky we will bump into each other again...

In that same underpass...

Three years... Five years from now...

When we've both seen more of life and have matured and grown...

Maybe...

Just maybe...






I’ll choose you. 

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